Israel's News & Views BlogBy Denis Schulz
Panel of notables:
Jethro Bodine
Baron von Frankenstein
SigmundFreud
Porky Pig
Gentlemen – Picture Number One:
Mr. Bodine: “I don’t get it. What are those things supposed to be? They look like crawdad innards. Ellie Mae’s Bessie can draw better than that. And where’s that Mohammed rascal? If he paid for this, I don’t blame him for being mad!”
Baron Frankenstein: “Hmmm…yes…yes…I see. Uh-huh…yes… I have seen this kind of work before. A man named Lawrence Talbot—a lycanthrope—a mild-mannered fellow but extremely quarrelsome during the full moon. He could throw quite a tantrum. He was scary.”
Mr. Pig: “T-That’s supposed to be Mohammed? Why are t-there so-so many of them? Is t-this another one of D-Daffy Duck’s cruel jokes? How much d-do they want for t-this stinker?”
Dr. Freud: “An excellent depiction of the schizophrenic personality. One can see the anger and lust in every line. The artist who created this monstrosity was subconsciously baring his soul. He should see a psychiatrist. He could be harboring a death wish.
Well, that was interesting.
Gentlemen – Picture number two:
Mr. Bodine: “If I bought something like this and hung it in the fancy eatin’ room Granny would whomp the tar out of me. And where is that Mohammed critter? He ain’t in this picture either! I don’t understand this. I think they got those toilet bowls screwed too tight to their heads! I’m gonna ask Uncle Jed.
Baron Frankenstein: “Hmmm…yes…I see. Ygor would appreciate this—a mindless recourse to violence. Apparently this Mohammed person has more followers than Adolph Hitler. It reminds me of The Zombies of Morotai—a bit less cultured perhaps, but no less violent.
Mr. Pig: “T-This is a gyp! T-That’s not M-M-Mohammed. T-They should have got B-Bugs or Elmer for t-this job! I’m a busy pig.”
Dr. Freud: “Splendid! Splendid! I see irrationality in the faces of these Goyim. The picture is so full of vagina envy it almost overwhelms me. The sword represents the castration they so much desire. The bomb is the release of their pent up sexual repressions. Who was the mad genius that painted this masterpiece? Was it Peewee Herman?”
We’re just getting warmed up.
Gentlemen – Picture Number Three:
Mr. Bodine: “I like this one! Which one of those rascals is Mohammed Atta? Granny’s gonna whomp the tar out of that varlet when she catches him. She’s been cutting hickory switches for years. Uncle Jed’s got firsts and I’ve got seconds. Anybody know if Mohammed ran out of virgins before this Atta rascal blowed himself up? I would hate to see him enjoying himself in Heaven.” (Don’t worry, Jethro. He went in the other direction)
Baron Frankenstein: “I’ve had castles collapse on me…I’ve had laboratories explode in my face…I have been buried in quicksand and frozen in ice. This cartoon is not funny…it is irrational. If I could, I would restore my monster—uh, my poor precious creature—and turn him loose upon them…give them a taste of their own medicine.”
Mr. Pig: “H-Ha-ha-ha-ha! T-This is r-really funny. It-It’s like M-M-MacDonalds running out of h-hambergers! W-Wait till I t-tell Petunia. She said M-M-Muslims didn’t have a s-sense of humor. Was she wrong! H-Ha-ha-ha!
Dr. Freud: “The true believer is always the last to discover he has been duped. There are no virgins where they are going. These childish fools have thrown away their lives for a mere chimera. Accept for the unfortunate denouement this is a hilarious cartoon. It must be the work of Al Capp or Charles Addams—or dare I say, that madcap, Peewee Herman.”
I think that went a little better.
Gentlemen – Picture Number Four:
Mr. Bodine: “This is stupid! Why would some moron put a bomb in his hat?”
Baron Frankenstein: “No, Jethro, this is worse than stupid—it is frightening. I saw the same look in the eyes of the bride of the Frankenstein monster seconds before the castle exploded. And now this fool in Iran, this Ahmadinejad wants the bomb…Ah, if only Ygor were still alive I could do something about this.”
Mr. Pig: “T-This is Mohammed? And he-he’s got a b-b-bomb in his hat? G-G-Gosh, t-the Roadrunner would make m-mincemeat out of him. W-What a stupid place to p-put a b-bomb!”
Dr. Freud: “I fear we are in the presence of a disciple of Nietzsche. This man is insane; he needs help; he may be suicidal. That bomb could go off any minute. We must contact Doctor Laura and Doctor Ruth. They know more about potty training than I do.”
This is getting interesting.
Gentlemen – Picture Number Five:
Mr. Bodine: “Somebody ought to take that knife away from that bozo!”
Baron Frankenstein: “The Wolf Man…Dracula…the monster—my precious monster…the Invisible Man…Freddie Krueger…and now this. I have seen them all. Heaven help us.”
Mr. Pig: “Hey! T-that’s the man that r-runs the slaughterhouse!”
Dr. Freud: “On further investigation, we had better forget Doctor Laura and Doctor Ruth and concentrate on finding a good hiding place….Does anybody, perchance, have Salmon Rushdie’s address?”
Gentlemen! Gentlemen! Where are you going? Please, we are not done! There are more picture! Look! Look! We’ve got this…
….and this…
…and this…
Ooops! Wrong pictures! Hey, Porky…you’ll like this one…
Gosh, they’re gone. I hope word of this doesn’t get out. It could finish maxflack.
6 Comments
Thank you so much! Have never laughed so much. Pictures great. Comments even greater.
Keep it up. Bless you guys
Absolutely Fantastic.
Frankenstein, Pig, Freud et al are great.
Have never laughed so much in a long long while. Thanks for making my day.
Muslims will soon be annihilated. Tsunami and Earthquake were just starters. Just watch and see.
Very Very good,really funny,the pictures
and comments are great,keep up the good work.
Sorry, this is stupid.
Don’t be sorry
haha…how pathetically ingnorant can ya’ll get? lame and so unhumane!
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